Wake me up when September ends

And I’m baaack. 🙂

I originally went on a hiatus because my dad stayed here for four days and we’re always out and about whenever our little family is staying in the same country together. However, I also went on some sort of soul searching, triggered by something that happened nearly a week ago..

  1. Rox gave birth and we named her only surviving puppy, Chicken. Chicken (or Chickee, to keep the tradition of giving my dogs names that end with -ee) is now three weeks old, she walks a lot, and have started growing teeth. She’s super cute but she smells like a little ball of saliva (courtesy of her mother). Eew.
  2. Dad bought me a Wilton Deluxe Tip Set! Yay!
  3. I immediately used the tip set on dad’s birthday cake. I need more practice since my hand’s awfully shaky. Dad’s cake would’ve looked like Harry’s if I wrote HAPPEE BIRTHDAE DADDY. Green icing since the cake turned out green instead of blue. Why, Ferna, why?
  4. Dad’s birthday dinner (which we didn’t enjoy).
  5. I have graduated last June and I’m still unemployed. Saying it out loud makes me feel ashamed of myself, but.. I’m really trying. I spent the past months waiting on and processing my application for this one position that I wanted – badly. So bad, I turned down a number of job offers (with above average salary for fresh graduates like me) to wait for it. Guess who put their eggs in the wrong basket? I knew they had an intense screening process so when I got scheduled for an initial interview, I was thankful my resume squirmed its way in. When I got another interview afterwards, hope started to grow. Two months (three separate interviews – I reached the final interview stage! – and a three-hour long exam) after, I get rejected. *sighs* I know that I’m not the best out there, but for a minute, I really thought I am good enough. I cried (and was filled with regret that I could have already been working, coupled with tons of facepalms and “ang tanga tanga ko, ang tanga tanga ko!”), ate half a gallon of ice cream and proceeded to make tons of cinnamon rolls. I love my coping mechanism.
  6. The next day, I locked myself in my room and sorted a thousand photos for half a day while playing Les Miserables’ I Dreamed a Dream on loop (that’s my sad song, okay?). The rest of the day, I took it to the bed..
  7. And I woke up feeling brand new (this was two days after I got rejected, just so you know :p)! I’m only 21, and you know what, failures should never be a hindrance. This is life. I take risks, some are worthy and the rest may seem stupid and idiotic (like flushing job offers down the drain for something without any assurance at all). The future may be filled with uncertainty now, but quoting someone I do not know “If your dreams don’t scare you, they’re not big enough”. I just know that if I keep working hard with my dream in mind, I will get there. It may take a while, but believe me, I will. 🙂 and here’s the result of finding better opportunities. I wore my pretty white shoes that kept my foot bleeding, the same day I scheduled two different interviews. I currently have a blister two third the size of my thumb on my left foot, and two other blisters on the other. It’s been three days, but it doesn’t show any signs of healing. Sigh.
  8. Bright side: Time to buy new shoes! Haha! The nearest SM Department Store held a 3-Day Sale. Both pairs of shoes in the photo are the last pairs available in that design and color (trust me, they look much more dainty in person and I feel like a delicate flower – that I’m not – with it on haha) and they were my size (size 9-10 ladies’ shoes aren’t exactly easy to find in cute designs)! Yes, I tried them on no matter how painful it was to do so, because both were sold for half the price. Four pairs in one month (although all pairs were under P300).. I have a problem.

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